I had a coaching client recently start a session stating that she felt completely drained, emotionally, physically drained. A great discussion ensued about what was draining her and what to do about it.
Have you ever felt like that? That feeling of energy being drained from you by people, situations, unfinished business, you know, the things of daily life? I think most of us have at one time or another. I know I have, but I’ve gotten better at cutting the energy drains off before they take me down.
We are energy beings. We are also living holistic beings. Our thoughts have energy and habitual thoughts can really pack a punch. All this energy flow is connected. Our bodies are not separated from our heads. We can feel physically tired from our emotional energy system being overworked.
We can put energy into our past with regrets or unresolved issues. And energy can go toward the future in a very draining way with worry. This leaves us all with less energy for today.
An effective way to deal with energy drains is to eliminate, change or accept.
If we can just eliminate the energy drain, well, that pretty much takes care of it, right? It’s not always possible but sometimes we can end a draining relationship, leave a draining position or just deal with things we‘ve been putting off.
By identifying the drain and eliminating it when possible, we have done ourselves some real good and you feel it, sometimes immediately. We may feel less tired. We may feel like the proverbial weight has been lifted and we sometimes ask ourselves why we didn’t eliminate this sooner.
If eliminating is not possible, then we get to changing and accepting. One of spiritual teacher Wayne Dyer’s favorite sayings is: “when we change the way we look at things, the things we look at change.” Many energy drains and many of our so-called problems come from our thoughts or, rather, our innocent misuse of thought. We can convince ourselves that things are a certain way; I don’t know if you’ve noticed but we can sometimes be totally wrong. We often work with incomplete information.
Recently I got a little upset with a change in scheduling that I thought I should have been informed of. I was ready to make a phone call or to fire off a text stating my feelings but I stopped. I took a few moments, breathed and settled down. I decided to call a few minutes later and calmly talk about another matter and see where our conversation led. Well, I found out the reason this person overlooked informing me was her dog had been seriously ill for days and had died an hour before I called her. She had been so out of her mind with concern and then sadness that she overlooked contacting me. I’m so glad I didn’t respond immediately. I would have caused more pain at a terrible time.
I tell you this because I felt the energy drain from the annoyance and inconvenience of not being informed but my thoughts were not accurate and were really unnecessary because I didn’t have all the information. The innocent misuse of thought, once again.
Another approach to eliminating energy drain is to accept. Just tell yourself in a calm but unwavering way, this is the way things are right now and you’re fine and everything is going to be fine. You have identified the drain and you realize the best approach — maybe the only viable healthy option right now — is acceptance.
This can sometimes be a tough one. Our egos and all these thoughts we’re so sure of are trying to convince us not to accept, but they are exactly what is adding to our energy drain. It’s the inner conflicts, the inner battles that drain us. It’s really often best to let it be. Let it go and free up that energy that you can surely use in other, more productive places.
So if you’ve been feeling mentally drained, which will lead to physically drained, stop and take a look. What are the drains? Who are the drains? Identify where it’s all coming from and start releasing. Start before the mental and physical toll leads to illness.
Our natural state is wellness, but we can also make ourselves unwell. Get a grip on those energy drains. Take the helm and be the captain of your ship. Enjoy the voyage.
Rob Gannon is a 25-year licensed captain and certified life and wellness coach. He offers free sample coaching sessions and can be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org. Comments are welcome at email@example.com.