Relationships can be challenging, even in ideal situations. The pressure can intensify when you live and work together within a yacht’s confines. These couples are making it work and share their tips for building a successful career together. Capt. Brendan Emmons and Chief Stewardess Julie Emmons, M/Y Freedom The couple met when Julie was a school teacher and Brendan was a crewmember. Their relationship was long-distance at first, but Julie joined the yachting industry after a few years. The couple doesn’t find living and working together challenging, although work separation helps. As captain, Brendan is in charge, but Julie runs the interior. “I make my own schedule and clean with the interior team, so it’s a good balance where we’re not constantly together all day, but we can be,” Julie said. It’s easier, she believes, since she’s not on the deck team. There are six crew on M/Y Freedom, and Julie works hard to balance her roles. As the captain’s wife, she admits she feels pressure when taking off time. “I always feel like it’s easier for anyone else to do it; it’s harder for me — [I worry] they’re going to be like, ‘Oh, well, you just get to do it because you’re the captain’s wife.’” Brendan believes having couples on board brings stability to the boat. “I think there are a lot of good couples, and I think they provide many benefits for owners because you have two crewmembers committed to the program together.” The best advice the couple would offer: “During the workday, don’t bring your personal problems or personal life into the workday. Keep that separate.” She shares that they don’t act like a couple during the regular work routine, but after hours, they consider themselves at home. “Sometimes we don’t even tell the charterers we’re married,” Julie said. “It usually ends up coming up, but sometimes they don’t know for half the trip. I kind of like it better that way.” Freelance Chef/Stew Kendra Castello and Chief Officer/Capt. Luke Stegen The couple met when Chef Kendra worked on Luke’s boat as a freelance chef. Kendra jokes that she developed Stockholm Syndrome. Luke has been in the industry for nearly 16 years, and Kendra for almost eight years. “We love working together; however, we’re worth more separately,” she said — it can be a financial hit to work as a pair as day rates are just more lucrative. But there are benefits to being together: “Nothing compares to turning a corner and getting to bump into each other.” Living and working together present challenges. It wasn’t easy when Luke transitioned from first officer to captain. “He says I’m the worst crewmember he’s ever had; I say he’s the worst captain I’ve ever had!” Jokes aside, working for her husband is tough because the job is 24/7. “He doesn’t get to clock out, nor do I,” Kendra said. “It can add a lot of tension, especially since there’s politics behind the scenes.” While negative perceptions toward hiring couples exist, like most things, one bad apple can spoil everyone’s reputation. “Couples can also inhibit the crew if one is amazing and the other is awful,” Kendra said. Her best advice to other couples: “Be kind and patient with one another. Not only is it tough to work together, but working in yachting is particularly challenging as you’re on top of each other all the time, and you are exposed to each other’s flaws so frequently. All you can do is try to be gentle and kind to one another.” Chief Stewardess Dana Rodrigues and Capt. Shaun Hucklesby, M/Y Destination Chief Stewardess Dana and Capt. Shaun married last year, but they’ve been together for the past six. They met in 2019 when they joined a boat on a 10-week charter. “Sparks flew faster than a tender with a dodgy spark plug at full throttle. …The rest is our Below Deck story,” Dana said. The lifestyle can make or break you, essentially fast-forwarding relationships. They began working together almost immediately. “Three months … on board is like a year in a regular relationship,” Shaun said. Normal relationship rules often go out the window. “There’s no mystery,” Shaun said. “There’s no casual dating when you share a bathroom, but we love hanging out together.” Finding the right work groove as a couple is essential. Working with another stew/captain couple set a strong example, and they work to establish a dynamic where that’s never a concern. It’s important to nurture your relationship but not isolate yourself by always sticking together. Dana and Shaun both value having separate and shared activities. “Balance doing things apart as much as you do things together. You aren’t one person — you’re two individuals sharing a life and career.” Finding work together hasn’t been difficult, but Shaun believes it’s harder for greenies lacking industry experience. “Some boats stay away from hiring couples because it can shift the dynamics on board … and it can be difficult if they break up and both leave,” Dana said. “Good couples can create a great team environment for the boat.” The couple is expecting a baby and anticipates changes ahead. However, they have built a career around figuring things out, so they will adapt. The yacht owner was happy to hear their news and willing to adjust to changing circumstances — he even threw them a baby shower.